It would seem to be impossible. But yes, it is true. More people have decided to start smoking not Marlboro cig but bath salts in an attempt to avoid the legal repercussions of buying crack. And though we cannot deny the similarity in look of your average bath salt to a bunch of crack rock, we decided to investigate this wholly perplexing trend on the drug scene.
What we found was that an admitted crack addict by the name of Smitty was feeling a bit stressed one day. He was out of crack and his dealer had been busted. So Smitty went to Wal-Mart and decided that some herbal relaxation therapy might do the trick. He purchased a 12 ounce container of Jasmine Delight Bath Salts and went home to the tub.
While he soaked in some aroma therapy, he couldn’t help but notice that the crystals he put into the tub looked just like the crack that he desired so badly. And as he tells it, “The scent of jasmine is so much more appealing than the smell of crack.” With these things glaring right at him, he could not help it. He decided to load up a bowl and puff.
The results that he got from this misguided experiment “blew his mind.” He got dizzy, began to hallucinate, and called up his on and off again “girlfriend” Miranda. She dashed right over to his place. Reluctant at first, she shook her initial impulse that this was a truly bad idea and went in for a toke. The two wound up in the hospital later on that evening, but boy did they have a story tell.
From there, this tale began to creep it’s way out to other junkies in need. Soon, many were trying vanilla and sandalwood. One instance has been reported of yet another mutation of this trend. Smitty’s brother decided to try smoking the shavings from a soap bar. He did not survive.
Now lawmakers are being faced with the potential need to outlaw bath salts. Come on now people. Don’t be smoking no bath salts. And stay away from the lotions!